Welcome, seeker of truth and seeker of better truth. We have it on good authority that our prophets are the best in the business. Our prophecies are 100% guaranteed to be 100% not entirely accurate.
Our team of expert prophets have been training for years, and our prophecies have been... well, let's just say they've been... 'interesting'. We're talking 50% chance, 50% probability, 50% of the time.
Want to know the future? Want to know what's in store for you? Click below to see the crystal ball of doom and gloom, or our special edition crystal ball of sunshine and rainbows.
Disclaimer: Not responsible for any emotional distress or spontaneous combustion caused by our prophecies. Or, you know, any other unforeseen consequences.